


The Case of The Missing Muse

by Steppenwolf



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Criminal Minds
Genre: Crack, F/F, Mild Language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-30
Updated: 2012-07-30
Packaged: 2017-11-11 00:58:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/472694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Steppenwolf/pseuds/Steppenwolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>While JJ is battling with her feelings for Emily, Emily and JJ need to work closely together in order to beat their latest unsub. And they work against the clock.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Case of The Missing Muse

**Author's Note:**

> Spoiler: Uhm none really… At least I don't think so. If so it's not intentional.
> 
> Warnings: There's a little language and some kissing. It isn't really a crack!fic (it seems I can't write crack) but it isn't to be taken seriously although there are some serious themes in it! It's FUN!
> 
> Author's note: BTW I like the Twilight novels, I read them twice and I love Alice to pieces! Bella + Alice FTW!
> 
> Author's note 2: This is for everyone who's muse went missing. You might think they abandoned you, but as you see that's not the case!

Agent Jennifer Jareau sat at her desk in her office and tried to look busy. She was perched over a file, the door was closed. And she hoped she could even fool Garcia over the video feed. She managed to turn the pages of the file in front of her from time to time while she wasn't paying attention at all. She was deep in thought really. Private thoughts. For the hundredth time in as many days she was pondering over her co-worker and friend Emily Prentiss; or her own feelings towards her to be exact.

JJ really didn't understand why this was so complicated herself. If Emily had been a guy they would have been together for months now and would probably fucking like bunnies every time possible. Emily had made it clear pretty soon that she was gay and very interested in JJ; as more than friends. Yet JJ had freaked out mumbling something about straight, co-workers and stay friends under her breath before fleeing the scene.

Yes JJ was totally freaked out that Emily was a woman and that she had feelings for her. She had never felt this way towards women before; she didn't even experiment in college. But now … she would lie to herself if she said that she didn't have feelings for Emily. Quite the opposite. She fell really hard for her. Right from the start; from the first case they worked together; from the time she had shown Emily the ropes around here. She just didn't recognize the signs at first because… Hello, woman! But soon after that the dreams had started. Hot, sexy, steamy dreams full of Emily in different stages of dress and undress. That's when she started to admit that she had fallen for her friend, a woman. But on the other hand, who wouldn't? When Emily had told her that she was very interested she had chickened out nevertheless. It was one thing to admit something to yourself in theory and something completely different to act on those feelings.

She had tried to overcome her affection towards Emily in every way possible. She had even dated that stupid cop from New Orleans. She had really tried to get back to normal; back to being the straight, good girl, the all American Sweetheart. But nothing had worked. If anything she had missed Emily, had dreamed of her when she was with someone else and she felt stupid and dirty, like she was betraying her.

And now with this new case she was working with Emily … it was just hard to be professional. Just looking at her made her heart stutter and her knees go weak. That she didn't get laid lately didn't help either. Working with her, hearing her sultry voice, seeing her strut around with that off center belt, watching her hands doing stuff made her horny as hell.

So basically JJ was in a deep hole she dug herself and now she was standing at the bottom and she had no ladder to climb back out. If she wanted to work this case she needed to come clean with Emily first. She had to talk to her the first chance she got and then she needed to fuck her brains out. Oh yes! She needed to talk to her at once. She wouldn't survive one more night getting herself off while fantasizing about Emily Prentiss.

Determined she closed the file in front of her and got up. She would talk to her right now. Hopefully they would be able to take the afternoon off. It was Friday and a slow one too after all. So a long weekend in bed with the brunette was high on her to do list. Or, if they didn't get to go home early, she could maybe bribe Garcia into scrambling the video feed in her office. She fanned herself with the file she took with her as an alibi. Wow. It was really hot all of a sudden as naughty pictures of Emily pinning her to her desk came into her mind.

Talking to Emily! Now!

She left her office and hurried towards the bullpen; only to come to a full stop as she realized that Emily wasn't at her desk. Where the hell was she, now that she was finally ready? She walked over to the desk more slowly looking for clues where the brunette might be.

Computer still working?

Check!

Open file on desk?

Check!

Bag under her desk?

Check!

Coffee mug?

AHA! The coffee mug was missing. So Emily probably went for a refill.

JJ hurried toward the break room, ignoring the curious glances Reid and Morgan where throwing at her. Maybe she could get Emily alone in there and they could talk. Maybe she could even show Emily how serious she was about this!

With neck breaking speed she shot into the break room only to nearly run into the person she was looking for.

"Hey Jayj! Where's the fire?" The older agent had a bemused look on her face, the younger one was so adorable.

"Oh hi! Emily. Sorry, I didn't mean to…"

"Can I help you with something?" the brunette asked pointing at the file JJ still held in her hands.

"Emily. I wanted to…"

But just in that moment her mobile started to vibrate and the tune of Melissa Etheridge's Secret Agent started blaring. She froze and threw her friend a panicked look. This wasn't good. She opened her cell and stared at the message in shock.

"Emily! Follow me", she shouted to her partner. "We got another one."

The older agent headed for the bull pen, grabbed her gear and was following the blonde agent through the halls of the BAU. They entered the elevator and once the door was closed opened the hidden panel beneath the regular buttons. In the now open compartment sat one additional button and two keyholes. Both agents took out identical keys that were hidden beneath their shirts on long chains, inserted them and turned the keys simultaneously. Then JJ pressed the button and the elevator started moving downwards.

"What did you want earlier Jennifer?" Emily asked cautiously in the few moments the lift needed to bring them one level below the official underground floors.

"Ah nothing important. We'll talk about it later. This is way more important."

"Sure." Emily frowned a little. JJ wanted to talk to her about something not work related then. Did she screw up their friendship? Maybe she just should have kept her mouth shut. How could she have been so stupid to tell JJ that she was in love with her? That was bound to backfire some time.

They passed the ground floor and the three official underground levels before stopping on a forth underground level that needed a special clearance. Only three people in the BAU had this clearance and it was only used when all other resources had been rendered useless. Like now.

The third member of their little elite group was already there, but since she was the one who sent the message it was no big surprise to Agents Jareau and Prentiss.

"Garcia what do you have for us?"

"Hey girlfriend...s! I caught a distress call 6 minutes and 25 seconds ago. It came in on the top secret frequency. And it seems like another one is calling for help. And even worse it's one of our own this time. She's a cop."

"Another one? That makes what? Five? Or is it sex uhm six already?" Emily asked still trapped in her musings a little.

JJ and Garcia both raised an eyebrow at the Freudian slip, but let it go, because there were more important things to discuss.

"It's number six." JJ replied. "And we still don't have the faintest clue what's happening. It happens all over the world. I checked with Interpol just yesterday. In addition to the six in the US there are about 20 cases all over the world. Australia, Great Britain, Germany, France. It's all over. And there seems to be no pattern whatsoever."

"Other countries too? Well then there are probably several unsubs. I mean unless he can teleport or apparate or whatever."

"Sheesh Emily, be a little open minded would you. This secret unit is there for a reason. We can't rule anything out yet."

"So what do we do? Where do we start?"

"Well my little denying ones. Even if you believe that teleportation and magic is nonsense. I the all knowing Garcia do know that it's real. You just need to know where to look."

Emily and JJ raised their eyebrows and looked at each other as if to say 'now she's officially lost her mind'.

"I saw that." Garcia scoffed and turned back towards her monitors starting to type furiously on the keypads.

"So the last one that was abducted was in Illinois. And the owner reported it shortly after. As in the other cases there were no signs of forced entry and no note. I think we should believe that the muses just left. But I think it's safe to assume they were abducted by some evil genius. I suspect Stephenie Meyer personally."

"Stephenie Meyer? The author of the Twilight series? Why her?"

"Well obviously she needs all the help she can get. Seriously? Vampires without fangs? Who blink like a neon sign in the sunlight? Pluuuueeessssaaaaase. Get real. She can't have a muse of her own so she needs to abduct others."

"Well sounds reasonable enough to me. Should we bring her in for questioning?" Emily was all business at once. Finally a lead, even if it came out of a hunch. To JJ she whispered, hoping Garcia wouldn't notice. "Do you think she would sign her books for me?"

"I heard that. And no it's not that easy. There won't be any proof. We need to be sneaky, we need to trick her."

JJ snickered. "Well and how do you propose we do that? Oh ominous one?"

"Don't mock the magic one. Jeeez you two are some profilers. Why do you think it's called computer MAGIC? Duh!"

"…"

"…"

JJ and Emily starred at Garcia and then at each other in disbelief.

"Uhm.. so do your magic then." JJ finally proposed.

"Well there's only so much I can do", Garcia replied while her fingers where still flying over her keyboard. "We need a witch."

"A what?" Emily asked.

"A widget? What's a widget?" JJ asked.

"Aaaargh… not a widget. A witch. As in in Sabrina, Hokus Pokus, Harry Potter? A witch. Burned on stakes some centuries ago. Comprende?"

"Ah that's easy."

JJ 's mouth fell open at Emily's remark. Easy? But then the sarcastic undertone hit her.

"We'll just look one up in the yellow pages then."

"Duh! Of course we don't look one up in the yellow pages", replied Garcia matter of factly.

Emily and JJ sighed in relief. At last Garcia wasn't totally out of her mind.

"I have one on speed dial, well actually two, but as they live together I only need to call one." Garcia hit speed dial and turned around in her chair smiling at the two dumbfounded agents.

Obviously someone picked up on the other end because Garcia started speaking into the phone.

"Yeah, hi. It's Penelope. You know the thing we talked about. I need you now. Could you… Ah okay. See you in a jiffy."

Garcia ended the call and turned towards JJ and Emily again.

"They'll be here in a few. So don't get spooked when…"

She couldn't finish the sentence, because all of a sudden, out of nowhere really two more people where in their little command center. Emily and JJ both jumped and drew their guns on the newcomers. Garcia on the other hand jumped up and threw herself at the two women.

There was some serious hugging but then Garcia remembered her two agent friends standing there their guns drawn.

"Emily, JJ. Put those guns away ASAP. Please let me introduce. JJ, Emily these are Willow – wicked witch of the west – Rosenberg and Tara – daughter of Avalon – Maclay, dear friends of mine from California and extremely powerful witches. Willow, Tara these are Agents Emily – cunning linguist – Prentiss and Jennifer – JJ bullseye – Jareau. They are the best in their field. And of course you all know me. Penelope – the Oracle of Quantico – Garcia."

There was a lot of shaking hands and curious glances all around. JJ couldn't help but admire the two witches who were obviously lovers. One of them, the one Garcia had called Willow had beautiful red hair and green eyes. She wore brown low cut leather pants and a black bodice that showed off her slim frame. The other, slightly taller one had dark blonde hair and womanly curves. She wore fitting blue jeans and a simple white shirt, with a long brown cardigan. While Willow's green eyes sparked with excitement her blue eyes where calm and compassionate.

"D-don't tease them Will. I-it has to be a l-little shock for th-them."

JJ's heart flew out to the blonde one. What a cute stutter. And this woman was supposed to be a powerful witch?

The redhead pouted slightly. "But I wanna. It's so much fun."

"Geez, could you all pull it together? We have serious business to attend to." Garcia intercepted the friendly joking. "You were here pretty quick, waiting for my call Wills? I know you're always busy saving the world and I'm grateful you two could make it on such short notice. So any apocalypse coming round these days?"

"Ya, well it was only a matter of time really until you would call, and you know how I like to be prepared, so I had an emergency teleport ready. You know... just in case... and well here's the emergency. Isn't it? It is an emergency, right? Because if it isn't I just used it for nothing. Well not that you're nothing Penny, we really miss you in the coven. And I know you're work here is just as important as what we do. Catching the baddies and stuff. But it was supposed to be some world saving emergency stuff you know. I'm really glad to see you." The read head grinned a little sheepishly.

Emily couldn't help herself but smile at the redhead babbling on about teleportation. Well she had to admit, there had to be some truth to it, or how else would those two just have appeared without any alarm going off? Well, witches or not the both of them were cute as a button.

Suddenly Tara looked at JJ and Emily very seriously.

"Willow. Look at them."

"What?" Garcia, JJ, Emily and Willow asked at once.

JJ and Emily looked questioningly at each other and then shrugged in unison. Someone would explain.

"Oh your right sweety. You were always better at this aura stuff. It's really fascinating. This will solve all our problems. It will be too easy now. Tell them!"

"O-okay. See, you two, your auras are v-very strong together. They're entangled in m-m-many places. O-obviously you're soul mates."

JJ wanted to interrupt, but Emily took her hand and indicated that she should be quiet and listen.

"But the connection is disrupted in some places." She indicated her forehead. "Here, the chakra of the third eye, which is simply put your understanding for the supernatural but also your empathy for other people. You're both very empathic for other people's needs and desires. It's what makes you good at what you do. But towards each other it's disrupted." She then put her hand beneath her belly button. "Here's the fifth chakra. It's basically your sexuality. Emily's chakra is strong in itself but forced in containment. JJ's chakra is a whirl at the moment. It's all jumbly. I would guess that you two haven't consumed your relationship yet? Well, as I said your connection is very strong. I haven't seen something this strong in a while. There were Xena and Gabrielle, Calleigh and Natalia, Spencer and Ashley, and Willow and I of course." She smiled at the read head adoringly. "Now we can use this untapped power to save all the muses at once. It is a rare opportunity and we should take it."

Silence fell after Tara had finished her little speech. The confidence seemed to have left her with her words and she was now looking to the floor, her hair shielding her eyes.

Nobody spoke for a while. JJ and Emily looked at each other wondering. Was it true?

Emily spoke first. "JJ? What was it you wanted to talk about earlier?" Her voice was barely more than a whisper.

"I wanted to tell you that I was so stupid for not accepting my feelings just because we're both women. I'm head over heels for you Emily Prentiss. Are you still interested in this dumb blonde?"

Emily just nodded and closed the distance with JJ about to kiss her.

"Separate." Willow's voice was calm but full of power. Without being able to resist JJ and Emily where pushed apart.

"Hey! What was that about?" JJ insisted to know. She had waited so long for this moment, how could anyone dare and ruin it?

"S-sorry. But we need to channel your energy properly in order to save all the muses. We need a little preparation, then we can do a sp-spell and after that you can go a-and well you know." Tara grinned shyly at them, blushing even more then JJ did.

"Fine let's get it done then. I'm horny!"

Emily's head shot up and she looked at JJ a little shocked.

"What? We've waited long enough didn't we?"

"It really won't take that long. It's just a small ritual to channel your energy. You just need to sit here and touch each other's hands while Tara and I do all the work. It won't hurt. Well probably. And you don't even need to be naked. Or do you want to be naked? You can do naked if you like, but there's no need to. Clothes are fine. Yup. Totally finy mac fine. Clothes are okay aren't they Tara?"

Emily and JJ both grinned at the new babble attack and JJ couldn't help but ask.

"So powerful witch huh, does the babbling help?" and she winked at Tara.

"Hey! No making fun of the witch. I could turn you all into frogs you know. Well maybe not frogs because… hello frog fear, but you get the concept. I totally could do that. I hurt an evil hell god once you know. That wasn't pretty I can tell you…"

Tara finally silenced the read head by kissing her sensually. "Shh, it's okay Will. Let's get started, shall we. We need to get back soon. It's getting dark in a bit and Kennedy and Vi will probably need our help, with Dawn being at the Watcher's council in Italy."

At once the atmosphere in the room changed. JJ felt the hairs on her arms stand up as if there was an electric charge in the air suddenly. The two witches had pulled some things out of a duffle bag JJ had failed to notice before. Or maybe it really wasn't there before, with those two who could be entirely sure.

Soon the preparations were finished. Tara had drawn a circle with some glittering powder unto the ground; there was only a little space left open. She indicated for JJ and Emily to step into the circle and sit down opposite each other touching their right hands. She closed the circle with more of the glittering stuff. When the circle was complete it started glowing and light engulfed Emily and JJ in the center.

Tara took Willows hands and together they started chanting in a foreign, long lost language.

JJ and Emily couldn't see anything besides each other through the light that was engulfing them like a cocoon. And separately yet together they thought what they were supposed to do. The chanting sounded like miles away or even years away, it all seemed so unreal. All that was real was the other one. Their hearts started to beat in the same rhythm, their breathing came in unison now, through their touching hands they felt the energy flowing freely back and forth between them and they could feel how their energies entwined even more, dissolving the discrepancies in their connection. And then without them even noticing they were kissing. Deeply, hungrily, feverishly and heated. There was a sudden explosion of light all around them and they were lying panting on the ground away from each other. The light and the circle were gone and the two witches plus Garcia were smiling at them.

"What?" JJ demanded to know.

"It worked. All muses are free and back with their rightful owners. We saved fan fiction."

The End


End file.
